


this world can hurt you, it cuts you deep and leaves a scar, things fall apart but nothing breaks like a heart

by endofdaysforme



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: F/F, I don't know where this came from honestly it just happened, I hope you like it regardless of its spontaneity lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-19
Updated: 2019-10-19
Packaged: 2020-12-24 10:27:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21097955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/endofdaysforme/pseuds/endofdaysforme
Summary: she feels cold lips on her neck, and she blinks back her own tears and runs her fingers through bright red hair, her own lips finding solace on the brow of the girl in her arms.the girl she loves.“shh…you’re not alone, cheryl. i’m here, okay? shh, calm down, baby, i’m here…” she coos softly, so insanely different from the woman who was pounding her fist into the face of a full grown man just twenty minutes ago.every snake has an underbelly. toni just prays no one ever finds out hers.—aka, toni topaz is the serpent queen when jason blossom is killed, and she’s hellbent on finding out who murdered him.





	this world can hurt you, it cuts you deep and leaves a scar, things fall apart but nothing breaks like a heart

**Author's Note:**

> allo, here's a random lil fic I started writing a few days ago.
> 
> an au where toni is the serpent queen when Jason's body is found, cheryl had nothing to do with his plans to escape and more that I don't want to reveal just yet, heh. read to find out!
> 
> also toni backstory! something the show seems incapable of doing! and also toni has more than three lines! something ELSE the show seems incapable of doing!
> 
> hahahaha, I'm tired.
> 
> anyways, hit me on twitter at @endofdaysforme and lemme know what you think, or you can leave a lovely little comment on here! more fics coming, I promise!
> 
> fic title from "Nothing Breaks Like A Heart" by Mark Ronson and Miley Cyrus

it began, for toni topaz, at the tender age of seven.

it began, as they say, in sunnyside trailer park, began with her learning how to crawl, how to speak, how to walk from the ages of one to five in the small trailer owned by tobias and mercedes topaz, and continued from the ages of five to seven as she grew up in sunnyside trailer park with her best friends turned brothers, sawyer ‘sweet pea’ peabody, fangs fogarty and forsythe pendleton jones the third, aka ‘jughead’ jones. she play wrestled with them, chased them around with a stick and whacked them when she got close enough, and huffed and puffed whenever one of them complained that she fought too tough for ‘a girl’. it was a typical childhood. a happy one.

but as the years went by, toni quickly began to develop a hatred for any sentence that ended with the words ‘for a girl’. 

_ ‘you’re pretty smart **for a girl.’**_

_ ‘you’re way too rough **for a girl.’**_

_ ‘you’ve got heart, kid…way more heart than this place, especially **for a girl.’**_

truth be told, the whole concept of ‘for a girl’ just pissed her off, and at the age of seven, when sweet pea muttered under his breath that she was ‘quite pretty’ for ‘a girl’, toni had decided that she would smash down the walls surrounding her and break free of that stupid stereotype that she was _anything_ ‘for a girl’. 

she wasn’t just ‘a girl’. she was toni fucking topaz, and she just so happened to _be_ a girl. so fucking what?

she was ready to stomp and fight and kick any ass that dared come up against her just because of her gender.

but of course, life dealt her the shitty card in its gamble with her, and two years later, at the age of nine, and with an incredible childhood filled with love and light and laughter behind her, the reality of the real world began to sink in, and suddenly, the whole ‘for a girl’ thing just didn’t seem to matter anymore.

because young toni topaz saw what she wanted to see. she saw loving parents, a caring mother with a heart of gold and a fiercely loyal father with a group of friends who would die for him without hesitation. she saw only the happy moments, the ones filled with laughter and love, the moments her father would watch her tackle sweet pea to the ground with a roar of laughter and a shout of ‘that’s my girl!’, or the moments where her mother would kiss the scrapes on her knees from playing too rough and tell her to be more careful.

she didn’t notice the cracks, didn’t notice the bruised knuckles and the haunted look in her father’s eyes or the way he began to drink more as time went by, or the way her mother would scoff and turn her nose at him every time he raised a bottle of beer to his lips, or the bags that began to develop under her eyes or the way she’d hold toni close in her bed on the nights when tobias topaz was out doing ‘business’ with her hand around the handle of a knife underneath her pillow.

at age nine, she began to notice.

it began, first and all too suddenly, with harsh whispers and anger that quickly turned into raised voices, and that eventually turned into arguments, to the point where toni would consider it a miracle if they went even a couple of hours without yelling at each other. it turned into screams of 'i hate you' and 'you disgust me', and eventually, on one particular night, when the shouts of anger from the kitchen less than six feet away from her bedroom in the topaz family trailer had ended with the sound of glass breaking before a scream echoed out, toni had curled up underneath her blankets in fear before the sound of pounding footsteps heading straight towards her had echoed out.

“antoinette! we’re leaving, let’s go!” 

rough arms had thrown the blankets off her and had gripped her and hoisted her up by her armpits until her nose was nuzzled into the warm neck of her mother, the scent giving her only a brief moment of calm as she clutched her mother's shirt between her fingers.

"mommy?"

"shh, it's okay, honey, we're leaving, i won't let him do this to you." 

toni didn't quite grasp the meaning of those words until much later in her young life when she returned to riverdale, but in that moment, as she was carried out into the kitchen with a warm hand rubbing up and down her back, she had heard the pride in her father's voice, and it's a pride that had stuck with her for well over two years until she had returned home.

"YOU CAN’T TAKE HER FROM ME, MERCEDES! THIS IS HER BIRTHRIGHT, HER DESTINY!”

“I WON’T LET HER BE RAISED IN THIS, TOBIAS! I DON’T WANT THIS LIFE FOR HER!” 

her mother was screaming, her father was screaming, toni’s ears were hurting and she just wanted them to stop, but all she did was clutch her mother closer as the trailer door was flung open and she was whisked away into the night. 

her mother had taken her to greendale first. then to centerville. then to new york. 

toni had complained the entire time.

she missed her friends. she missed her father. hell, she even missed her father’s friends. she missed her life back home, and little toni topaz at age nine didn’t understand why her mother was taking her away from the home she loved.

now, at the age of seventeen, with blood staining her knuckles and an anger she’s never felt before boiling in her heart, does toni finally begin to understand.

her mother didn’t want this life for her.

she chose it, anyway.

“i think he’s had enough, kid.” 

f.p jones’s voice sounds strained and exhausted, but it sounds too far away for toni to register it as she grips the collar of the jacket the man tied to the chair before her is wearing, her fist driving into his nose with a sickening crack that has him howling in pain. she grits her teeth, tugs him closer and growls right into his face without a single care of just how _feral_ she must look right now.

“i want answers, and if you don’t give them to me, i’ll send little pieces off you back to malachai in a box until i get them!” she spits out, the smell of urine and sweat filling up the cramped space of the basement of the whyte wyrm as the ghoulie before her begins to whimper in pain. his face is unrecognizable by her hand, and toni can’t help but feel a smug sense of accomplishment despite her mother’s voice in the back of her head tearfully telling her this isn’t what she wanted for her.

_“don’t go back, toni…don’t become your father.”_

she kept her promise. she didn’t become tobias topaz.

she’s _more_ than he ever was.

and yes...maybe it resulted in her mother angrily cutting her off for choosing her father over her, but she can't bring it in herself to regret it.

not when she has family...not when she has...

“yeah, i hit pretty hard for a girl, huh? trust me, i got a few brass knuckles with your name on it that’ll hurt even worse if you don’t _start talking._” toni hisses, gripping the chin of the young man before her and forcing him to look into her eyes with the only one he’s got that isn’t swollen shut, and the fear and panic in them only gives her pause for the briefest moment before she remembers who she’s doing this for.

_you’re doing it ** for her.**_

“i d-don’t kn-know anything, i s-swear!” he somehow manages to get out through a swollen mouth and missing teeth, tears mixing with the sweat and snot and blood already staining his face. 

toni grunts in disgust before she’s shoving him back and turning to face f.p jones, the older man watching her with narrowed eyes before he straightens up and nods once.

silent communication. respect and camaraderie.

she may be much younger than him, but f.p jones respects leadership, regardless of age or gender.

he also respects her father, and tobias topaz’s last words to his best friend and second in command will always be his driving force.

_“she’s my kid…you protect her. from anyone and anything. she’s the future, my friend…the serpent queen. you be the father to her that i never could be.”_

“i’ll get him to talk, don’t you worry. go ice that hand of yours. and don’t flake out on dinner tomorrow night, i’m making lasagna.” he says simply, rolling up his sleeves and craning his neck as the ghoulie tied to the chair wriggles pathetically in his bonds. toni makes her way towards the basement door, reaches for an already filthy rag and begins to wipe the blood away before she comes to a stop and calls out without a backwards glance.

“he’s favoring his right side which means he’s right handed…start with his index finger, take it from there.” she says firmly, and she can’t help but smile when she hears f.p jones chuckle before the sound of bone meeting flesh echoes out behind her. 

she makes her way up the basement stairs with a tired sigh, stops by the bar and asks birdie for a cigarette, glares at the older woman when it’s tossed at her with an under the breath comment she can’t quite make out before she’s heading to the pool table where her most loyal friends are.

her brothers. 

sweet pea looks up at her with a frown at her bloodied knuckles, but hands her his zippo lighter without a word while fangs and jughead merely watch the way she lights up the cigarette between her fingers and takes a long drag from it.

no words need to be spoken.

she’s serpent queen.

she says, they do.

“your dad’s gonna get tired eventually. head down in about ten and help him out. don’t stop until that bastard says something of value.” she says simply.

no questions asked. no hesitation.

“on it. we’ll make him squeal.” jughead says firmly, adjusting the beanie on his head before he’s leaning over the pool table. he takes his shot, crows with victory when he sinks two balls, and laughs with fangs when sweet pea curses under his breath and slams another ten bucks on the table. 

toni watches them play for a little longer before her phone buzzes, and she doesn’t even need to look at it to know who it is before she’s pushing herself up out of her seat, stubbing out her cigarette and making her way towards the entrance. no one questions her, no one asks her where she’s going.

she’s serpent queen. they don’t ask questions, they answer them.

she heads straight to her bike, shoves her helmet on and is speeding away from the whyte wyrm and heading to the place that once held so many good memories for her, but now holds nothing but grief and sadness.

sunnyside trailer park comes into view five minutes later, and toni topaz rides her bike straight towards the trailer closest to the woods, right at the back of the park. 

she sees only a hint of the cherry red convertible hidden behind the trailer, the cherry red convertible that she's so used to seeing now, on days when it isn't around, it feels like a part of the trailer is missing.

she rips her helmet off, turns off the ignition, unstraddles her bike and makes her way to the front door. it’s already open, of course, and she enters with a sigh, throws her helmet and keys onto the table beside the door and turns her head to see a small figure curled up on her couch, crying into her hands. 

toni doesn’t say a word, ignores the way her heart breaks at the sight and shuffles towards the figure slowly, and the second she collapses down beside it and grips the figure’s shoulder, she’s met with a loud wail before cold arms are wrapping around her neck and pale legs are straddling either side of her waist.

she feels cold lips on her neck, and she blinks back her own tears and runs her fingers through bright red hair, her own lips finding solace on the brow of the girl in her arms.

the girl she loves.

“shh…you’re not alone, cheryl. i’m here, okay? shh, calm down, baby, i’m here…” she coos softly, so insanely different from the woman who was pounding her fist into the face of a full grown man just twenty minutes ago. 

every snake has an underbelly. toni just prays no one ever finds out hers.

“i missed you.” cheryl blossom whimpers into her neck, the arms around it tightening as toni smiles against pale skin and pulls the redhead in impossibly closer to her own body.

“i missed you.” she says back simply. cheryl sniffles, pulls back with tears streaming down her beautiful cheeks, and the sight only makes toni blink back tears of her own as she smiles and reaches up to brush her thumb over the tender skin, eliminating all physical proof of her despair.

“anything yet?” cheryl croaks out, nimble, pale fingers wrapping around toni’s tanned wrist before she’s frowning at the bruised and swollen knuckles of toni’s left hand. the pink haired girl sighs and purses her lips before brushing her thumb over cheryl’s lips with a firm nod.

“i’m working on it, baby.” she murmurs. cheryl swallows thickly, the tears clinging to her eyelashes falling as her bottom lip trembles, her whole body shaking and only causing toni to shift beneath her so she’s closer to her.

“i want to find them, toni. the ones responsible, i want-.”

“we will. the serpents will find whoever did this and i swear to you on my _life_, cheryl, we will make them pay.” toni hisses fiercely, that ever present gang leader that resides within her making an appearance…a side of her she _hates_ for cheryl to see, but a side of her that exists nonetheless…

“i miss him so much, t.t…”

it’s pathetic, really, how easily the serpent queen turns into a puddle of anguish at the sound of her girlfriend’s voice sounding so _small_, how the leader of the dangerous and criminal motorcycle gang on the southside of riverdale, a young woman who rules with a goddamn iron fist, can be reduced to tears at the mere sight of the person she loves looking so distraught over the twin brother that’s now gone forever…dead at the hands of someone in this town, someone who toni will stop at nothing to find for causing the girl she loves any pain.

“i know you do, baby…i know.” 

it’s with her lips pressing kisses to the inside of cheryl’s wrist that toni finally spots the blue and black blotches beneath her pale complexion, and almost five years of experience being a part of cheryl blossom’s life has taught her where these bruises come from.

“baby…”

“it’s okay.” cheryl says it straight away without hesitation even though it’s the furthest thing from okay just like she always does, and toni is containing her anger in her already bruised and beaten left hand as she clenches her fist and jaw and does her best not to jump up and ride her bike straight to the northside to find penelope blossom, to make her suffer.

“no, it’s not. i swear to god if i ever get my hands on your mother-.”

“shh…just, please…” cold fingers grip her chin, cradle her jaw and lift her gaze up, her brown, tired eyes meeting equally bloodshot and exhausted brown eyes before cheryl lets out a shaky breath against her and trails her fingers down to grip the collar of her jacket, her forehead slamming against toni’s with a dull thud.

“take me to bed, toni.” 

it’s not an uncommon request, and it’s been happening more frequently since jason blossom’s body washed up on the shores of sweetwater river over five weeks ago, but toni finds herself sighing as she pulls back with hesitation, only to be silenced before she can say anything when a finger presses to her lips.

“shh…please, please just take me to bed…” 

every snake has an underbelly. a weak spot.

and with not another word uttered as her pink lips crash against cheryl’s red ones, toni finds herself again just praying that no one ever finds hers.

—

“he finally croaked. got some new info for you.” 

f.p jones’s voice sounds strained and exhausted, not too far from how he always sounds, but something extra there in his tone that has toni throwing the covers back with a sigh as she rubs the sleep from her eyes and suppresses a yawn.

“i’ll be there in twenty. keep him conscious for me.” 

“you got it, kid.” toni hangs up, throws her phone onto the bedside table and rolls over, wrapping an arm around a slim, pale waist and pulling cheryl blossom in closer as she drops a kiss to her bare shoulder with a sigh. 

“i gotta go. you can stay here as long as you like, but maybe move your car a little further in behind the trailer so no one sees it, okay?” she murmurs against her skin. she hears cheryl inhale sharply before she nods slowly, burying her face further into toni’s pillow with a tired groan as the pink haired serpent queen chuckles and presses a kiss to her temple. she’s about to jump off the bed when cheryl’s fingers catch her wrist, and toni swallows the lump in her throat at the sight of the bruises on her pale wrist that look even worse in the morning light filtering in through the blinds of the window in her bedroom. 

“is it jason?” cheryl croaks out. toni purses her lips, contemplates lying, but decides against it.

she doesn’t lie to cheryl blossom. anyone but her.

“yeah…might have a lead.” she says firmly. cheryl exhales loudly before she’s pushing herself up and turning to face toni, who tries very hard not to look down at the way the blankets fall down to expose her bare chest and the many bruises on her pale flesh that toni put there just last night with her lips and teeth-

“let me come with you.” cheryl says firmly. 

toni doesn’t hesitate.

“no.”

“toni, you’re doing this for me, i should be there-.” cheryl starts, but toni’s already off the bed and pulling her underwear back on with a shake of her head. 

“cheryl, no. that’s final.” she says with nothing but authority dripping from her tone, and if it were any other person, they’d heel and obey at the sound of it.

not cheryl blossom. _never_ cheryl blossom.

“i’m not a serpent, you don’t get to boss me around.” cheryl scoffs, and toni sighs in frustration and shrugs her bra on before she looks to her girlfriend pleadingly.

“that’s not what i’m doing! i’m trying to protect you, okay?! we’ve kept this thing between us a secret for over three years for a reason, cheryl! not just because of the whole northside versus southside bullshit, and not just because of your parents, but because i’m the _serpent queen!_ if the wrong people find out about us, they’ll come for you, and just thinking about it makes me sick to my stomach! god, your brother-.”

“exactly! _my_ brother! not yours! _he’s_ the one that’s dead, toni! if it was one of those boys i always see you with, if it was one of them that was killed, wouldn’t you want to be involved in catching their killer?!” cheryl snaps, jumping out of the bed and staring her girlfriend down in her goddamn birthday suit while toni tries her best not to panic at the mere idea of cheryl coming with her to the whyte wyrm.

out of the question, absolutely fucking not.

“not if it meant putting someone else i love at risk!” toni exclaims, her voice still soft as ever as it always is whenever she talks to the girl before her. a girl whose life has been filled with so much heartbreak…god, toni still remembers the day they met five years ago like it was yesterday…a bathroom break at pop’s diner while her father collected payment from pope tate himself for protection from the serpents at the small age of twelve that changed her life forever…

_“hey, are you okay? why are you crying?”_

_“my daddy hit me…because i did something wrong.”_

_“that doesn’t seem fair.”_

_“it isn’t! jay jay gets away with everything and i always suffer the consequences! i just want it to stop…”_

_“i can help if you want…my dad, he’s the leader of the southside serpents.” _

_“that…that gang of criminals?”_

_“uh well…yeah i guess so. but we always help each other out. that’s what the serpents are about. we’re a family.” _

_“all my family’s ever done is hurt me…”_

_“i won’t hurt you. i promise.” _

_“i don’t even know your name.”_

_“antoinette topaz. but everyone calls me ‘toni’.”_

_“i’m cheryl…cheryl blossom.” _

toni remembers how her father had reacted when she’d asked for his help later that night, remembers how he’d gripped her bicep and hissed at her under his breath to stay away from cheryl…

_“the blossoms are nothing but trouble! you stay the hell away from their daughter, toni, i mean it!”_

she never was very good at listening to her father. being away from him for two years when her mother took her away left a hole in their relationship that never fully repaired, and though it makes her sad, it also makes her happy.

he may have been serpent king, but toni never obeyed him. she didn't have to.

for how could she ever, _ever_ think to stay away from the girl before her?

the girl with bright red hair and full lips and god, such soulful brown eyes that are right now filled with tears because of her.

“baby…i know you want justice. fuck, i do too, but i promise you, i’m doing everything i can to find out who killed jason. but i won’t put you in danger to do that, so just let me handle it. please, cheryl?”

the redhead crosses her arms over her chest and kisses her teeth, and toni decides to step closer, arms reaching out, hands beckoning her forward and watching with a smile as cheryl blossom rolls her eyes and steps closer, allowing toni to take hold of her waist so she can lean up to press a sweet kiss to the corner of her mouth.

“please just let me handle it?” toni whispers against her skin, and cheryl sighs shakily before she’s grabbing a fistful of toni’s hair and enveloping her lips in a sweet kiss, moaning at the taste of her in this intoxicating way that has toni gripping her harder before she pulls away with a breathless gasp.

“god damn you, toni topaz. god damn you to hell.” she breathes, resting her forehead against toni’s as the pink haired girl chuckles. cold fingers grip her chin, force her gaze upwards sternly, but not unkindly, and cheryl lets her tears fall as she tightens her grip on toni for just the briefest moment before she talks.

“you find his killer. and when you do, you tell me. promise me right now that you’ll tell me.” she whispers. toni licks her lips, presses a kiss to the bruise on her wrist of the hand holding her face and nods without hesitation.

“i promise. anything for you.” she whispers back. cheryl purses her lips, but says no more, lets her go, and toni sighs and reaches for her jeans, quickly pulls them up and buttons them before grabbing a flannel and her serpent jacket. she’s just at the bedroom door when-

“and toni?” she stops just as she slips on her flannel, turns to watch as cheryl looks at her with the world’s most adoring smile, one that doesn’t quite match the utter worry and concern in her eyes.

“don’t…don’t put yourself at risk. i love you, and i can’t lose you too.” she says firmly, her voice only slightly wavering with more unshed tears as toni throws on her serpent jacket and makes her way over to cheryl once more. she cups her cheek and kisses her soundly on the lips, once, twice, three times, dedicates it to memory before she pulls back with a smile.

“i know, baby. i love you too.” she promises. cheryl simply hums in response, hands raising to fist the collar of toni’s jacket to pull her in for one last lingering kiss before she lets her go.

“good…now go. and just…don’t die.” she grumbles. 

and toni smiles and kisses her brow with only one promise on her mind.

“i won’t. not while i still love you, cheryl blossom.” 

—

her wrists are aching, her head is pounding, and the man in the chair before her doesn’t even resemble a human anymore.

but f.p jones gives her an encouraging smile as she tries to piece together what he’s just told her while the both of them barely acknowledge the terrified, muffled screams of the ghoulie before them.

“so…jason was getting ready to jet on the downlow…leave riverdale with some girl named polly cooper on the northside?” 

“sounds like it. think she was his girlfriend. alice cooper isn’t happy that her daughter is involved.”

“yeah, well, fuck alice cooper.” toni hisses, running her fingers through her hair before she clenches her jaw and slowly turns to face the ghoulie strapped to the chair before her.

jason was going to leave town? was going to leave _cheryl_ behind for some girl? 

she can’t show her anger at the idea of cheryl’s twin brother wanting to leave town and leave her behind to fend for herself against her monstrous parents, so instead, she channels her anger into the one thing standing before her.

“he was leaving town with his girlfriend, which is probably something his parents would never approve of. which means he would’ve needed money. which means he would’ve approached the ghoulies…or us.” toni breathes quietly, turning to f.p before she licks her lips and makes a quick decision. f.p’s eyes widen before he scoffs and shakes his head with a clear of this throat.

“i, uh...i don’t think any of the serpents would do-.”

“maybe not. but i have to know. serpent meeting. tomorrow night here at the wyrm. tell everyone. they’re asses are here by seven sharp or they’re out.” f.p clenches his jaw, but nods once and moves off the wall to make his way upstairs.

“on it.” 

toni takes a deep breath in, turns to face the ghoulie once more as f.p’s footsteps echo up the stairs, and she tries her best to show zero remorse or care as she steps forward once more, feels that anger boiling into uncharted territories as she reaches into her pocket for her switchblade with an almost animalistic growl.

because if jason needed money and he went to the ghoulies…

“did he come to you, huh? did he come to you for money?” toni hisses, grabbing the ghoulie by the throat and watching as he whimpers before she kisses her teeth angrily.

“if you won’t talk, then i guess you don’t need your tongue anymore!” she roars, forcing the ghoulie’s mouth open and sticking her blade right into the back of his throat-

“i’ll cut it right the fuck out, i swear! maybe then i’ll shove it up your ass, and then stick it back down your throat so you’ll be tasting shit for the rest of your life, how does that sound, huh? DID JASON BLOSSOM COME TO YOU FOR MONEY?!” she screams, flipping her blade in her hands and sinking it right into the ghoulie’s hand that’s tied down to the armrest. he screams, the sound gurgled from the blood still caking his throat and mouth as he sobs and shakes his head and begs for her to stop, and all toni can do is swallow the bile in the back of her own throat down, try not to look down at the two stubs that used to be his index and middle finger as she twists the knife clockwise before lifting it up to shove it back into his mouth-

“NO! NO MORE, PLEASE!” he screams, struggling in his bonds with what little energy he has left as toni grips his hair and forces his head up, resting the blade on his neck as she does.

“then talk!” she hisses. 

“you’re r-right! he w-wanted m-money! but we t-told him to g-get lost! didn’t w-want a b-blossom working for us! we d-didn’t k-kill him, i s-swear!” 

“and you think i’m gonna take some ghoulie scum’s word for it?!” toni growls, pressing the knife in deeper as he squirms and shakes his head with a cry of panic.

“PLEASE DON’T KILL ME! I’M TELLING THE TRUTH!” 

“all you ghoulies are lying pieces of shit! if you didn’t accept his offer than who did!?” toni screams, pressing in even further before-

“why don’t you look at your own people!?” the ghoulie growls. toni’s eyes widen, the shock of his words slamming into her before she screams and presses her knife into his neck, drawing more and more blood, wanting it to gush out, to end him slowly-

“kid, that’s enough!” 

rough hands grip her bicep and pull her back, and toni shoves whoever it is back and watches as f.p glances down at her switchblade before raising his hands in surrender.

“you want him dead, he’s dead! but not by your hand. you let me do the dirty work, that’s how it’s always been.” f.p says firmly. toni swallows thickly, sweat dripping from her brow as she shakes her head and turns back to the ghoulie with nothing but anger seeping into her veins.

“he…i-.”

“let me handle it. get up there, have a drink and relax. i told my boy to tell everyone else, but you know he likes to dawdle. go spread the word about the meeting tomorrow.” he says almost shakily, reaching for the switchblade to take it from her hands, but toni yanks it back and flicks it shut, turning to face the ghoulie once more and watching how his chest rises and falls with heavy breaths before she looks to f.p with a nod.

“make it swift. dump him on malachai’s doorstep.” 

she heads to the stairs, but once again is tugged back by f.p jones as he looks at her with a tired and heavy sigh.

“don’t think this won’t have consequences. you’re gonna start a war with the ghoulies.” he says firmly. toni scratches at her brow with a scoff and shrugs.

“look around you, f.p. a kid is dead. we’re already at war.” 

—

toni knows the whispers are getting louder.

the whispers and questions of why. why is a southside serpent always hanging around riverdale high on the northside of town? why isn’t she at her own school on the southside?

truth be told, toni stopped bothering with high school the second her father died when she turned fifteen and she became the serpent queen, something that earned her much chastisement from cheryl at the time.

and therein lies the answer to why toni is regularly seen hanging around riverdale high, smoking a cigarette and leaning against her bike behind the fence while she waits for the right moment, the right time to strike.

she’s never failed yet.

and with a ferocious bang as she slams cheryl blossom against the lockers and kisses her with all the passion she can muster, toni finds herself not really caring much about the whispers anymore.

“god, you’re fucking sensational…” toni mumbles against pale skin, teeth gnawing and capturing some of it between them before her plump lips are closing around it and sucking hard to draw out a long and almost volatile moan from the girl being held against the locker room doors of the cheerleader’s locker room. cheryl’s long legs wrap around her waist with a heavy pant, fists clenching into her hair to draw her face up for a messy kiss while toni’s hands grip her thighs and immediately reach for her underwear beneath her skirt.

“y-you-_fuck_, i…god, _yousaythateveryday!_” cheryl pants in a rush, nails digging slightly into toni’s scalp as the pink haired girl smiles at the way cheryl inhales sharply when she brushes her fingers over her clothed center.

“that’s because every day i mean it, baby.” toni whispers, pressing a gentle kiss to cheryl’s pulse point and smiling when cheryl hums happily against her before she’s bucking her hips against toni’s hand impatiently.

toni can't really remember the exact moment she and cheryl blossom started this little tryst of theirs, but what she does remember is that it happened suddenly and all at once.

they had been fourteen, hanging out at a park on the northside in the middle of the night, the both of them sneaking out to meet each other like they had been for the last two years since they first met each other, toni hanging upside down from one of the bars and cheryl playing with the grass at her feet when cheryl had brought up the fact that some kid in her grade had asked her out.

_"his name is archie andrews. he's got red hair like me, but...i don't think i like him." _

_"why not? seems like he's perfect, cheryl. go enjoy a date with mr. northside, become his little northside queen!"_

of course, the mere mention or idea of cheryl dating anyone but her had sparked an anger inside her that had her mocking the very idea of it, and toni had been reeling from these new emotions that had sprung inside her with no warning, her mind not quite processing _why_ she was so upset about the idea of cheryl dating some other person she didn't even know before cheryl had jumped up from the floor, had grabbed her face and had kissed her.

toni still remembers how much the blood was rushing to her head from hanging upside down on the bars, but in that moment, all she could taste was cheryl's cherry chapstick and nothing else seemed to matter.

_"why be his northside queen when i'd rather have the southside one?"_

and that had been that.

now here they are, three years later, still sneaking around, but more in love than toni ever dreamed could be possible. 

she loves her...god, she loves cheryl blossom with such insanity, she's surprised she's not locked up somewhere because of it.

“you might wanna make this quick, i’ve ordered the vixens to come to the gym for practice as soon as the bell rings, which should be in about twenty minutes.” cheryl teases, and toni rolls her eyes and presses a quick kiss to her lips before she’s grabbing cheryl’s thighs and unhooking them from around her waist.

“twenty minutes? plenty of time. let’s see if i can beat my record of five in a row.” toni says with a mischievous grin, dropping down to her knees and running her hands up and down cheryl’s thighs as the redhead hooks her left leg over toni’s shoulder.

cheryl has a comeback resting somewhere in the depths of her mind, but it easily gets lost in the cloud of pleasure that overtakes her the second toni’s finger hooks into her underwear to pull it to the side, eyes rolling into the back of her head that slams against the locker door behind her with a breathless pant as toni’s talented tongue gets to work ravishing her. 

half an hour later, with cheryl’s legs shaking like jelly after six straight orgasms in a row (new record, toni thinks smugly) as she pushes toni towards the back entrance, it dawns on toni that they’re truly playing a dangerous game here, and that they could get caught any minute…

but when cheryl grips the collar of her serpent jacket and kisses her so fiercely, she feels like her lips are burning before she whispers into her ear that she’ll sneak out of thornhill tonight to come see her, toni walks away with a strut and a grin, thinking that despite the risks, that redheaded girl is worth it.

so, so worth it.

“mmm, don’t break your promise to stay up for me.” cheryl mumbles against her lips, and toni smiles against them and pecks them one last time before:

“i’d never break a promise to you. not while i still love you, cheryl blossom.” 

—

toni’s hands are shaking.

she’s gripping the newspaper between her clenched fists, and it’s taking every goddamn iota of her being to stop herself from riding her bike to the northside and smashing _the register_ office to smithereens.

because painted in black and white for the whole town to see on the goddamn front page:

_ **“SOUTHSIDE SERPENTS TO BLAME: WHY WE SHOULD BE POINTING THE FINGER OF BLAME FOR JASON BLOSSOM’S DEATH ON THE CRIMINAL GANG THAT CONTROLS THE SOUTHSIDE.”** _

toni inhales deeply, exhales just the same and tries her goddamn best not to crack as f.p sighs loudly beside her.

“guess alice cooper still has a grudge against me from our high school days…” he murmurs.

“or she’s trying to take the attention off her daughter, who is pregnant, by the way. with jason’s babies…” toni hisses, throwing the paper down onto the table she’s sitting at as she shakes her head with a scoff and steals the cigarette between sweet pea’s fingers to take a nice, long drag.

cheryl had told her that little nugget of truth this afternoon in the locker room, and toni had been so shocked into silence, it took cheryl kissing her to get her attention back to where it belonged: on her.

“what do we do now? the northside already fucking hates us-.” sweet pea starts, but toni raises a hand to silence him with a shake of her head.

“i don’t know, pea. but first things first…is everyone here?” toni asks wearily, looking up at f.p, who simply nods once. toni sighs and stands, but not before f.p grips her forearm and looks at her with a sad smile.

“are you regretting leaving your mom behind in new york and coming back here yet?” he asks softly. 

it’s a question he asks her often.

but toni has the same answer every time, and despite everything that’s happening now, that answer hasn’t changed. because her main reason for not regretting it remains the same.

cheryl blossom. always cheryl blossom…

“no. this is my _home_. and the serpents are _my_ family. always and forever.” she says firmly, not untruthfully, but not honestly either as she makes her way to the stage and raises her hands with a loud yell.

“SERPENTS! IF I CAN HAVE YOUR ATTENTION!” she roars over the music, which immediately dies down as every serpent in the whyte wyrm turns to face her. toni takes a deep breath in before looking around at everyone in the room.

her family.

_one of them could’ve killed jason…_

“as i’m sure you’re all aware…alice cooper has written an article blaming the serpents for the death of jason blossom!” there’s an instant outburst of angry shouts, people clearly annoyed at the woman on the northside who abandoned them, who abandoned her serpent jacket for blazers and pantsuits, so readily smearing their name and pretending as if she never bore the skin of a serpent before…

“quiet down now! i know it hurts and i know we’re all angry! but if there’s even a chance of truth in that article, i need to know and i need to know _now!_” toni calls out firmly. a few people exchange glances and a few of them shift uncomfortably, and toni sighs and offers them all a reassuring smile before she nods.

“i know you’re all worried, and it pains me to ask or accuse anyone of going behind my back! but the serpents are _my_ family and i will always do everything in my power to keep my family safe! when i took on the crown of serpent queen, i promised you all that i would protect you! i don’t plan to go back on that now! but if any one of you had _any_ involvement with jason blossom’s death, i need you to come forward! in unity, there is strength!” toni cries, raising a fist and watching with pride as every single serpent in the room does the same.

“IN UNITY, THERE IS STRENGTH!” they scream back. toni swallows the overwhelming lump in her throat and lets out a sigh before she nods at everyone around the room.

“if anyone has any information, you come to me and me only! i will keep you safe, i will keep you protected! no serpent stands alone! that code has never been more true than it is now!” toni promises, and with that, she jumps down off the stage and returns to the table where sweet pea, fangs, jughead and f.p are, plopping down in the empty seat beside sweet pea and reaching for his pack of cigarettes on the table.

“gonna pay me for that?”

“i keep the lease going for the trailer park that keeps a roof over your head, isn’t that payment enough?” she snaps angrily, watching with a glare as he belches out a laugh and raises his hands in surrender.

“noted, oh mighty one.” 

it isn’t until much, much later in the night, when almost all the serpents have gone home, that it finally happens.

toni’s elation grows and grows the longer no one comes forth, and she finds herself grinning from the complete and utter fatigue but relief crashing through her when f.p comes forward to tell her everyone except byrdie, who is tending the bar, has gone home. 

“looks like no one knows anything.” jughead says with a resolute clap of his hands, and toni just finds herself nodding in agreement, praying that he’s right.

but then f.p tells jughead to head on out and to take fangs and sweet pea with him. and then he tells toni that they need to visit the coffee shop around the corner to get their cut of money from the owner for keeping the business safe from ghoulies. 

and when toni is about to remind him that she did her run of collecting money from all the businesses they protect just a few days ago, he gives her a look that has her heart plummeting down to her feet.

_no…no, no, no, not f.p, please…_

she follows him outside, and he’s barely taken two steps when toni’s grabbing him by the lapels of his jacket and pushing him against the brick wall of the bar behind him in anger.

“what did you do, f.p?! did you kill him!? tell me!” she hisses, and f.p grips her wrists and pries her off before he straightens his jacket and clenches his jaw with nothing but anger shining in his own eyes.

“look, kid, i don’t know why you’re so obsessed with finding out who killed jason blossom, but it wasn’t me! but…i did meet with him. or more he sought me out.” f.p breathes, running his fingers through his haphazard hair as toni tries her best not to punch him square in the face. she clenches her jaw and exhales through her nose before looking at him almost murderously.

“what did you do?” she whispers. f.p sighs in frustration and shakes his head.

“i didn’t do anything, alright!? and maybe that’s the problem! he…look, the kid came to me looking to get in on some cash. he thought i was the leader, and i told him to scram, to get lost, but he wouldn’t stop bugging me! i kept telling him to leave me be, but…god, he was desperate, and after a while…i caved. i told him i’d talk to you about it, but before i could…he was gone. i…i led that boy straight to his grave.” f.p says shakily, clenching his jaw once more as toni blinks back her tears and shakes her head with a light growl.

“god, why didn’t you tell me the first time he approached you!?” she cries out, her tears falling before she can stop them as f.p blinks back his own.

“because i didn’t think you’d care! you _hate_ the northside, why the hell would you wanna help out some rich kid from there?!” f.p says almost matter of factly, and toni feels the bile rise in the back of her throat because this…

this is all her fault.

if jason had known about her and cheryl, he would’ve come straight to toni for help. if f.p knew about her and cheryl, he would’ve told toni straight away, and she would’ve helped him. she and cheryl would’ve worked together to help her dear brother out and now instead…

“oh god…” toni keels over, hands gripping her knees as she tries her best not to throw up, and f.p watches her with a trembling chin as he wipes away his tears and shakes his head.

“no one will connect us to him or his death! if i had helped him-.”

“he’d still be alive.” toni croaks out hoarsely in despair. more tears fall down f.p’s face as he tucks a hand in his back pocket and hangs his head in shame.

“i…i wasn’t gonna do anything without your approval, or that could put you or jughead or any of the serpents in danger. that clifford blossom…he’s not to be messed with.” 

toni sighs and eventually moves to the wall of the wyrm, sinking down against it before f.p joins her not a minute later.

“i made a promise to your dad that i would never question your reign, but i would do everything i could to protect you during it. and i’m not questioning it now, toni…i _never_ would. but you gotta tell me why you’re so hell bent on finding out who killed him-.”

“his sister.” toni whispers, head sinking back against the wall with an almost relieved sigh escaping her as f.p stops short and stares at her in confusion.

“what?” he breathes. toni licks her lips and fights back a whimper before she turns to face the man who has been like a second father to her her whole life.

“his…his twin sister, cheryl…i’m in love with her. we’ve been dating for three years now, keeping it all secret because we were so worried…about her parents finding out, about the ghoulies finding out…about _anyone_ finding out. but my girlfriend’s twin brother is dead and i can’t sit by and do nothing while she cries on my shoulder every night in pain over the loss of him.” toni’s bottom lip trembles, a tear falling from the corner of her eye as f.p takes a few moments to process what she’s just said before he sighs and runs his fingers through his hair again.

“jesus christ, toni…” he whispers. toni finally lets out that whimper and shakes her head as more tears fall.

“i’m sorry.” she whispers back. f.p sighs and reaches out to grip her shoulder tightly.

“why are you telling me this now?” he asks softly. toni looks up at him, all doe eyed and sad, so like the day her father had finally succumbed to the abuse he had spent six years putting his liver through, dying as a broken man with a broken body...

_she’s just a kid…_

“because maybe if i had told you sooner…you would’ve come to me straight away and w-we could’ve s-saved him-.” toni blubbers out, and f.p doesn’t hesitate as he pulls toni into his embrace with a tired and sad sigh.

“shh…hey, kid, this isn’t on you…it’s on whoever murdered him. and we’re gonna find that son of a bitch and bring some justice and peace to your girl, i promise.” he whispers into her hair.

and for the first time in a long time, toni allows herself to be scared, to be vulnerable as she clutches f.p closer and prays that somehow, magically…all of this pain will just go away.

—

it doesn’t go away.

in fact, it only gets worse for toni topaz when she finally gets back home at one in the morning.

she’s surprised to see her door open, but no cherry red convertible in front of her trailer, and she climbs the small steps and knocks once before entering to find cheryl sitting on the couch-

with alice cooper’s article in her hands.

toni’s heart stops beating. 

cheryl is trembling from head to toe, covered in sweat with her boots covered in mud and dirt, and it doesn’t hit toni that she must’ve ran all the way here from the northside until cheryl looks up at her with mascara tracks running down her cheeks from sweat and tears.

her eyes portray none of that warmth they usually do when cheryl looks at her…no, instead, they’re filled with nothing but anger.

it’s silent for so long, toni’s skin itching and her body shaking with just as much fear as cheryl lets out a shaky breath and holds up the newspaper in her hands.

“well?” she croaks out, waving it back and forth as toni shifts uncomfortably on her feet and drops her gaze down to the floor, unable to stare any longer at the look in cheryl’s eyes…the fucking _hatred_ in them that’s directed straight at her…

“well what?” toni whispers back. cheryl scoffs and stands up, throwing the newspaper down onto the coffee table before she makes her way over to toni slowly.

“is it true? did the serpents have something to do with his death?” cheryl asks coldly. toni looks up at her in surprise, eyes wide before she licks her lips and immediately shakes her head.

“i…no, cheryl, fuck, of course we didn’t have anything to do with his death! i told you we didn’t! when have i ever lied to you!?”

“alice cooper-.”

“is doing everything she can to swing the attention off polly, off her daughter so no one suspects her of having something to do with it! she’s pinning it on the most likely suspects, that’s all this is!” toni exclaims, immediately stepping forward to take cheryl’s hands into her own. cheryl flinches away from her for only a moment before she’s meeting her eyes once more, searching for any grain of dishonesty, and when she finds none, cheryl visibly relaxes, her tense shoulders lowering as she lets out a shaky sigh and nods.

“okay…okay, good, i just-.”

“i know, it’s okay. but cheryl, when i told you we had nothing to do with it, i meant it. god, do you think i’d be working so hard to help you find his killer if i knew the serpents were involved?” toni says with a small smile. cheryl looks up at her in shock, eyes wide and that anger returning as it quickly dawns on toni what she’s just said.

_ah, fuck…fuck, fuck, you idiot-_

“so you’d lie to me for them, keep them safe if they _did_ have a role in his murder?” cheryl says stonily, yanking her hands out of toni’s grip as the serpent queen sighs and shakes her head.

“no, fuck, of course not, cheryl, that came out wrong! if a serpent was involved, i’d have them exiled, kicked out of the serpents forever, make them leave town and never return-.”

“so you wouldn’t even have them killed? an eye for an eye?” cheryl deadpans, crossing her arms over chest with that look in her eyes growing angrier each passing second.

toni’s heart sinks.

“i…cheryl, that’s not-.”

“oh, toni, cut the crap! you think i’m not aware of what it is you _do_ as serpent queen?! we've known each other for five years, you think i don't know!?” cheryl hisses, scoffing as she tosses her hair over her shoulder and makes her way towards the door.

“wait! cheryl, don’t leave like this, please! look, i…i held a serpent meeting tonight and i asked every single one of us if they had anything to do with jason’s death! no one came forward! i asked them if they had any information, and nothing!”

“and you believe them?! you trust them!?” cheryl screams, turning back around and taking a step forward as toni winces and steps back.

because she’s faced so much in her life, but the sight and sound of cheryl blossom screaming at her is something she never wanted to witness. 

“they’re my family, cheryl. and serpent code says no serpent betrays their own. they wouldn’t lie to me…and i wouldn’t lie to you.” toni says softly, reaching a hand out to take cheryl’s once more, and finally…_finally_ the redhead’s eyes soften before her bottom lip trembles and she clasps toni’s hand into her own tightly. 

“i…god, this is _killing_ me, toni, not knowing who did this to him, who took him from me, th-they’re still out there—.”

“i know…i know, baby, but…but one of my serpents told me something tonight, and it might’ve opened the doors to a new lead, but…” toni trails off in hesitation, fear for f.p now pounding through her as cheryl suddenly looks at her in confusion.

“‘but?’” she says eagerly, desperate for some new information and fuck, toni’s a good liar, but never…

never would she lie to cheryl blossom.

“jason…he approached one of my serpents for money to leave riverdale, and they turned him down…they didn’t want to do anything without my approval first and they thought that i…that i would never agree to help someone from northside. but jason kept hounding them, kept asking them for help for weeks, he was that desperate, and after a while, my serpent caved and told him he’d get my permission first, that he’d talk to me about helping him, but…jason was killed before they could.” toni says slowly, tears already building in her eyes and causing her voice to crack from the tension in her throat as she watches the love of her life piece her words together.

it’s silent once again, the sounds of dogs barking in the distance before-

“you could’ve helped him.” cheryl breathes. 

toni’s eyes close, and any hope she had to fix this just _disappears._

“i know…i kn-know, i could’ve. but cher, baby, i didn’t know, i-.”

“he’d still be alive if he had known about us. he would’ve come straight to you for help, but you said no one could know. we kept this hidden when if we hadn’t, he would’ve been under serpent protection, we…we failed him, we’re the r-reason he’s g-gone-.” cheryl bursts into tears, her whole body shaking as toni steps forward to grip her shoulders with a wild shake of her head.

“no! no, cher, baby, this isn’t on us! this…god, baby, it’s killing me right now that i didn’t know he approached us, because if i had known, i would’ve done _everything_ in my power-.”

“THAT’S THE THING, TONI!” cheryl screams, ripping herself out of toni’s grip before she raises a finger at her accusingly.

“you have all this power and yet what do you have to show for it?! nothing!” she growls, her voice shaking from anger and grief and tears falling down her cheeks as toni tries her best to just _breathe_ right now because this cannot be happening…

she can’t lose cheryl, not on top of everything else.

“baby…please just listen to me?” toni whispers, reaching out for her once more, and once again, cheryl lifts her hands away from toni’s reach and shakes her head, more tears falling as she choked on a sob and looks right up at toni.

“i…i can’t do this anymore, i c-can’t.” cheryl sobs, reaching for the door of the trailer as toni’s knees buckle at the words she’s been dreading to hear all night.

_no, no, fight for her, this cannot be happening-_

“n-no, cheryl, please, just wait-.” toni almost collapses forward to grab her, but she’s too damn far away as cheryl rips the door open and looks back at toni with nothing but despair.

“just…just stay away from me, toni, please…” she breathes, her foot on the edge of the doorway…

_no, fight for her, toni, fight, please!_

“i can’t do that, cheryl. not while i still love you.” toni manages to get out through her tears and choked out sobs.

and cheryl pauses before she turns to look at toni with a sad, heartbreaking smile.

“then stop loving me.” 

and with that, she leaves, not even glancing backwards as toni falls to her knees with an anguished cry and her heart breaking in a million little pieces.

—

at the end of it all, almost three months after jason’s death, and almost a month and a half after cheryl ended things with toni, all is revealed.

toni doesn’t find out the news until a day later.

she hasn’t left her trailer in weeks, has left serpent duties to f.p while she sat in her despair that fills the small home with every passing day that cheryl doesn’t come back to see her, wallows in her pain and ignores everyone and everything who tries to coax her out of hiding.

she doesn't want to think about the serpents, about jason, about anything anymore. cheryl is gone, cheryl has left her and toni's lost the one thing in her life that made sense.

she grieves and she mourns the loss of her love, until, a day after jason’s killer is found, f.p jones shows up on her doorstep with a sadness in his eyes that has toni immediately asking-

“who did it?”

and f.p sighs and runs his fingers through his hair before-

“they found a tape of clifford blossom shooting jason in the basement of some storage building owned by the blossoms. he hired some ghoulies to dump his body in sweet water river after it was done. apparently…apparently the kid found out his father’s maple syrup business was a front for a drug ring operation. he was about to expose his father and needed the money to get out of town with his girlfriend and their unborn baby after doing so, but…clifford found out and eliminated him before he got the chance. bastard killed himself too, before sheriff keller could arrest him for jason’s murder.”

and that was that.

toni falls to her knees and weeps and cries and screams for the girl on the other side of town who is most likely suffering, who is most likely in an even darker place than she was before after now discovering her _own father_ had been the one responsible for taking her dear brother’s life, and toni tries to push herself up, to pick herself up and march right to the gates of thornhill to see her, mumbling under her breath about doing so before f.p grips her shoulder with a sad shake of his head.

"not yet, kid...give her time and space."

toni cries and crumples, decides f.p can go fuck himself and she'll go see cheryl tonight, because she can't...she can't stay here in this trailer knowing that cheryl is suffering...

but cheryl, of course, beats her to the punch.

because it's two in the morning when toni shrugs on her serpent jacket and is about to make her way out when she opens the door and comes face to face with the disheveled looking redhead, hair a mess, eyes bloodshot red and puffy from crying, and toni doesn’t say a goddamn word.

she just opens her arms with tears falling down her own cheeks as cheryl lets out a loud wail and immediately collapses forward into her waiting arms, clutching her tightly while these almost inhumane screams of anguish escape her. 

“i’m s-so s-sorry-.”

“shh…nothing to be sorry for, i’m right here, baby…” 

toni has no idea how many hours have passed since she scooped cheryl into her arms and led them to her room, how long it’s been with the both of them lying in bed, clutching each other close and refusing to let go for a single second, and she finds that truthfully, she doesn’t care.

she’ll spend forever in this shit box trailer, trying to piece together the fragmented and broken life and world of cheryl blossom if she has to.

because toni loves her. and despite the agony that she’s been through for the last month and a half, toni finds it all erased with every sniffle that escapes the girl in her arms, and every motion to clutch her tighter that cheryl makes against her.

it isn’t until much longer later, when toni’s eyes are itching with fatigue and unshed tears, that cheryl looks up at her with those doe filled eyes containing so much grief and sadness, that words finally escape the redhead.

and toni isn’t at all surprised to hear them.

“promise me you’ll never leave me, toni.”

the sound of her voice sounding so weak and defeated breaks her heart, but toni smiles regardless and plants a kiss right between her eyes, only one thing on her mind.

that fuck…toni topaz is a good liar.

but never…never could she lie to the girl she loves.

“i’m not going anywhere, i promise. not while i still love you, cheryl blossom.”


End file.
